i want to be a better person.

i hate how i feel

i wish i'd married someone else

i want to be able to tell people what i think without fear

i want her child to be stillborn. she deserves it, though the child does not.

i hope he will leave her and destroy her hope, so she knows what she did to me

i haven't forgotten anything

i hope i can forgive myself.

i want her to want me back. and for me to reject her.

i want her to not know she destroyed my hope

i never want her to smile again

no matters what happens i cannot forget them

i wish that two of my ex's had died

sometimes i wish i'd been born gay

late at night i want to disappear

i wonder if i should continue

I've cheated on every partner I've ever had.

I've realised that on the inside I am a vile person.

One of my ex's had cervical cancer. After we split up, I prayed for it to kill her.

I wonder how much sympathy I would get it if I had breast cancer.

I may get bored of this. I may not.

She gave me herpes and $37,000 of debt.

Sometimes when I masterbate, I think about hitting my ex-wife in the face when I come.

In My Secret Life

I tell you the things I can never admit to myself.